140: 3 Clear Signs You Need Couples Counseling with Monica DiCristina
Have you ever considered going to couples counseling, but were afraid of the unknown? The first step is often the hardest because you are not sure what to expect. In Episode 140, we interview Monica DiCristina, a Licensed Professional Counselor, about some tell-tale signs your relationship could benefit from counseling. We also discuss what to expect during your initial counseling session, how to know if you and your therapist are a good fit, and what to do if one partner is more willing to pursue counseling than the other. We also ask Monica to take us through a counseling session using a real-life example that plagued our marriage for almost 7 years! We hope that our vulnerability will help demystify what happens during a counseling session and help you take the next step toward healing and wholeness in your relationship.
In This Episode, You’ll Hear About
- Tell-tale signs that it is time to pursue couples counseling:
- You find yourselves locked in the same patterns and having the same fights.
- The way you were able to make up and move through a fight to reconnection is no longer working.
- You feel more and more distant from one another.
- What to expect during your initial counseling session.
- How to know if you and your therapist are a good fit.
- What to do if one partner is pro-counseling and the other is against going to counseling.
- Eavesdrop on Daniel and Christina attending marriage counseling with Monica!
Resources We Mention During This EPisode:
- To find out more about Monica, head to her website
- Having some persistent conflict with your spouse? Listen to our previous episodes about relational conflict:
Quotes And Tweets:
- Naming our struggles can help us keep our identity and worth intact from what we are struggling with. – Monica DiCristina
- We tend to underestimate how much we are carrying as a couple during the pandemic and beyond. Sometimes you just need some extra support. – Monica DiCristina
- The couple’s comfort is the most important. It’s not uncommon for one part of the couple to be nervous. – Monica DiCristina
- The therapist and couple are on the same team. The therapist should be trying to join with the couple. – Monica DiCristina
- We are on the same team. Nobody is on trial. We are here together to look at what’s not working and what’s hurting. – Monica DiCristina
- A good sign that you have a good fit with your therapist is that you feel comfortable with them. – Monica DiCristina
- If your partner is not ready to see a counselor and you still want to pursue help, seek out individual counseling. – Monica DiCristina
- It’s really easy to be mad at each other when you don’t see each other’s vulnerabilities. – Monica DiCristina
- Therapy isn’t just talking about what is going wrong. It is also talking about each other’s strengths. – Monica DiCristina
- Educate your therapist about what your needs are. – Monica DiCristina
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Meet Monica DiCristina:
Monica DiCristina is a Licensed Professional Counselor with more than a decade of experience in individuals and couples therapy. She walks with people as they process difficult experiences, helping to bring healing to their relationship with themselves and others. Through her podcast, writing, speaking, and counseling work, Monica carries out her heartfelt mission to guide and collaborate with others in their process of becoming who they were made to be.