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Episodes / Marriage

19: How to Handle and Resolve Conflict in your marriage

May 28, 2018

In Episode 19 of The IMbetween Podcast, Daniel and Christina Im discuss how to identify, deal with, and resolve conflict in your marriage.  

 In This Episode, You Will Hear About:

  • What healthy and unhealthy conflict look like
  • How to identify and deal with conflict
  • How to quickly resolve conflict
  • The difference between compromising versus agreeing
  • Internal processor versus verbal processor
  • How conflict is usually never one-sided
  • How the way your family handled conflict will be reflected in the way you resolve conflict
  • The power of the “I” statements
  • Situations where couples may need to seek outside help to resolve their conflict

Resources Mentioned During the Episode:

  • Ephesians 4:25 -29   Therefore, putting away lying, speak the truth, each one to his neighbor, because we are members of one another. Be angry and do not sin. Don’t let the sun go down on your anger, and don’t give the devil an opportunity. Let the thief no longer steal. Instead, he is to do honest work with his own hands, so that he has something to share with anyone in need. No foul language should come from your mouth, but only what is good for building up someone in need so that it gives grace to those who hear.
  • The power of “I” statements  – a worksheet to help practice using “I” statements
  • 3 second rule – during conflict, the principle of thinking for 3 seconds before responding
  • Every Try Counts – Daniel refers to this website during the podcast

Quotables:

  • “Never having conflict is a warning sign.”
  • “It’s not about compromising, it is about agreeing.”
  • “Learn to identify where the conflict started and where it resulted from.”
  • “What did I do to contribute to this conflict?”
  • “Lay down your swords and pick up your shields.”
  • “We are on the same team.”
  • “You are fighting for the health of your marriage.”
  • “Sometimes you need new tools in your tool belts.”

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And don’t forget to subscribe to our podcast, so that you will never miss an episode!

TAGS:"I" statements3 second ruleagreeingangercompromisingconflictcoupleEphesiansfamilyhealthhealthyinternalmarriageone-sidedresolveshieldssunswordsteamunhealthyverbalwarning
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Daniel and Christina Im
about us

Daniel and Christina Im

We’re Daniel and Christina Im. Our heart’s desire and mission is to give you the tools to build a strong, connected, and joy-filled marriage and family.

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One significant takeaway from our latest episode with @shannonbrinkwriter is the power of empathy in relationships, especially when one partner is enduring prolonged suffering. Shannon emphasizes that genuine empathy, rather than superficial reassurances, is crucial. This approach helps foster an environment where both partners feel heard and understood, navigating their struggles together. It’s a reminder of how important it is to be truly present with our loved ones in their times of need.

Tune into Episode 193 of the IMbetween Podcast wherever you listen to your podcasts!
imbetweenshow
imbetweenshow
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One significant takeaway from our latest episode with @shannonbrinkwriter is the power of empathy in relationships, especially when one partner is enduring prolonged suffering. Shannon emphasizes that genuine empathy, rather than superficial reassurances, is crucial. This approach helps foster an environment where both partners feel heard and understood, navigating their struggles together. It’s a reminder of how important it is to be truly present with our loved ones in their times of need. Tune into Episode 193 of the IMbetween Podcast wherever you listen to your podcasts!
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đź’™ The role of the Enneagram in enhancing self-awareness and partner understanding.

đź’ś Natural states of intimacy for different Enneagram types and potential conflicts.

đź’– Creating a safe environment for open communication about intimacy.

đź’ž Navigating differences in sexual desires and preferences between partners.

đź’š Insights into the strengths and growth areas of each Enneagram type regarding intimacy.

♥️ The importance of vulnerability and emotional connection in intimate relationships.

đź’™ Strategies for addressing and overcoming intimacy challenges specific to each Enneagram type.

đź’ś The significance of nonverbal cues and emotional awareness during intimate moments.

đź’• Encouragement for couples to explore deeper connections through understanding their Enneagram types.

Tune into Episode 191 of the @imbetweenshow wherever you listen to podcasts!
imbetweenshow
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Did you know that your Enneagram type affects what happens in the bedroom with your spouse? In Episode 191 of the IMbetween Podcast, we interview Christa Hardin (@enneagramandmarriage) on: ♥️ Understanding the Enneagram and its relevance to intimacy in marriage. 💙 The role of the Enneagram in enhancing self-awareness and partner understanding. 💜 Natural states of intimacy for different Enneagram types and potential conflicts. 💖 Creating a safe environment for open communication about intimacy. 💞 Navigating differences in sexual desires and preferences between partners. 💚 Insights into the strengths and growth areas of each Enneagram type regarding intimacy. ♥️ The importance of vulnerability and emotional connection in intimate relationships. 💙 Strategies for addressing and overcoming intimacy challenges specific to each Enneagram type. 💜 The significance of nonverbal cues and emotional awareness during intimate moments. 💕 Encouragement for couples to explore deeper connections through understanding their Enneagram types. Tune into Episode 191 of the @imbetweenshow wherever you listen to podcasts!
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Listen wherever you get your podcasts! Episode 189 on the IMbetween Podcast.
imbetweenshow
imbetweenshow
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In Episode 188, @danielsangi and @christina.therapy talk with @steveryancarter, who shares his journey through grief and insights from his new book, “Grieve, Breathe, Receive.” Steve discusses his complex relationships with his adoptive and biological fathers. emphasizing the importance of processing grief with hope. He introduces a framework for navigating grief, encouraging listeners to honour their feelings and remain open to the beautiful surprises that life can bring. The episode offers valuable perspectives on healing, reconciliation, and the transformative power of hope. Listen in wherever you get your podcasts by searching “IMbetween Podcast” or by going to IMbetween.org/episode188.
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@imbetweenshow

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Hello Instagram

One significant takeaway from our latest episode with @shannonbrinkwriter is the power of empathy in relationships, especially when one partner is enduring prolonged suffering. Shannon emphasizes that genuine empathy, rather than superficial reassurances, is crucial. This approach helps foster an environment where both partners feel heard and understood, navigating their struggles together. It’s a reminder of how important it is to be truly present with our loved ones in their times of need.

Tune into Episode 193 of the IMbetween Podcast wherever you listen to your podcasts!
imbetweenshow
imbetweenshow
•
Follow
One significant takeaway from our latest episode with @shannonbrinkwriter is the power of empathy in relationships, especially when one partner is enduring prolonged suffering. Shannon emphasizes that genuine empathy, rather than superficial reassurances, is crucial. This approach helps foster an environment where both partners feel heard and understood, navigating their struggles together. It’s a reminder of how important it is to be truly present with our loved ones in their times of need. Tune into Episode 193 of the IMbetween Podcast wherever you listen to your podcasts!
2 months ago
View on Instagram |
1/5
Did you know our culture is increasingly aware of the importance of our inner life and rejecting hustle culture? In Episode 192 of our podcast, @mindycaliguire shares insights from @soul_care’s “listening tour” that revealed this shift. 

To hear the key to thriving in a busy world, tune into Episode 192 of the IMbetween Podcast wherever you get your podcasts.
imbetweenshow
imbetweenshow
•
Follow
Did you know our culture is increasingly aware of the importance of our inner life and rejecting hustle culture? In Episode 192 of our podcast, @mindycaliguire shares insights from @soul_care’s “listening tour” that revealed this shift. To hear the key to thriving in a busy world, tune into Episode 192 of the IMbetween Podcast wherever you get your podcasts.
2 months ago
View on Instagram |
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Did you know that your Enneagram type affects what happens in the bedroom with your spouse? In Episode 191 of the IMbetween Podcast, we interview Christa Hardin (@enneagramandmarriage) on: 

♥️ Understanding the Enneagram and its relevance to intimacy in marriage.

đź’™ The role of the Enneagram in enhancing self-awareness and partner understanding.

đź’ś Natural states of intimacy for different Enneagram types and potential conflicts.

đź’– Creating a safe environment for open communication about intimacy.

đź’ž Navigating differences in sexual desires and preferences between partners.

đź’š Insights into the strengths and growth areas of each Enneagram type regarding intimacy.

♥️ The importance of vulnerability and emotional connection in intimate relationships.

đź’™ Strategies for addressing and overcoming intimacy challenges specific to each Enneagram type.

đź’ś The significance of nonverbal cues and emotional awareness during intimate moments.

đź’• Encouragement for couples to explore deeper connections through understanding their Enneagram types.

Tune into Episode 191 of the @imbetweenshow wherever you listen to podcasts!
imbetweenshow
imbetweenshow
•
Follow
Did you know that your Enneagram type affects what happens in the bedroom with your spouse? In Episode 191 of the IMbetween Podcast, we interview Christa Hardin (@enneagramandmarriage) on: ♥️ Understanding the Enneagram and its relevance to intimacy in marriage. 💙 The role of the Enneagram in enhancing self-awareness and partner understanding. 💜 Natural states of intimacy for different Enneagram types and potential conflicts. 💖 Creating a safe environment for open communication about intimacy. 💞 Navigating differences in sexual desires and preferences between partners. 💚 Insights into the strengths and growth areas of each Enneagram type regarding intimacy. ♥️ The importance of vulnerability and emotional connection in intimate relationships. 💙 Strategies for addressing and overcoming intimacy challenges specific to each Enneagram type. 💜 The significance of nonverbal cues and emotional awareness during intimate moments. 💕 Encouragement for couples to explore deeper connections through understanding their Enneagram types. Tune into Episode 191 of the @imbetweenshow wherever you listen to podcasts!
3 months ago
View on Instagram |
3/5
As we approach Black History Month, join us as we hear @trillianewbell share inspiring stories of Black Christians and how a shared meal can ignite meaningful conversations about history and identity! 

Listen to Episode 190 wherever you get your podcasts, or by clicking the link in our bio.
imbetweenshow
imbetweenshow
•
Follow
As we approach Black History Month, join us as we hear @trillianewbell share inspiring stories of Black Christians and how a shared meal can ignite meaningful conversations about history and identity! Listen to Episode 190 wherever you get your podcasts, or by clicking the link in our bio.
4 months ago
View on Instagram |
4/5
🥦 Food isn’t just fuel; it’s packed with emotions! 

On episode 189 of our @imbetweenshow podcast, we discussed with @caroline.fausel from @oliveyouwhole on how our emotional ties to food can influence our eating habits (among many other topics related to living a simply healthy life).

Ever found yourself reaching for snacks when stressed? Caroline explains how our brains wire together experiences of using food to feel better, and how this emotional connection can complicate our relationship with food. On this episode you will discover how food is deeply personal and understanding our emotional ties to it is crucial for lasting change.

Listen wherever you get your podcasts! Episode 189 on the IMbetween Podcast.
imbetweenshow
imbetweenshow
•
Follow
🥦 Food isn’t just fuel; it’s packed with emotions! On episode 189 of our @imbetweenshow podcast, we discussed with @caroline.fausel from @oliveyouwhole on how our emotional ties to food can influence our eating habits (among many other topics related to living a simply healthy life). Ever found yourself reaching for snacks when stressed? Caroline explains how our brains wire together experiences of using food to feel better, and how this emotional connection can complicate our relationship with food. On this episode you will discover how food is deeply personal and understanding our emotional ties to it is crucial for lasting change. Listen wherever you get your podcasts! Episode 189 on the IMbetween Podcast.
4 months ago
View on Instagram |
5/5
@imbetweenshow
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